confessions

havent talked in so many days... in a few days it will be a week.
so not fair!!
i understand some things are wrong and weighing heavy on him, but really....?
definitely not fair to me ...
i know i dont always say the right things and im not strong with the comforting but i dont ask for much . just a simple... ::this sht fckn w me too much to talk:: would help my days go by smoother....

crazy huh?

how one person can have so much control over your feelings and emotions...
so much control!
i am the one that needs to be in control

swear i dont ask for much and he knows what it takes. knows women need attention and i have yet to receive anything
was worried about him for a while but he updated his status so i knw hes alive...
so...
when you going to check in on me?

feeling so incomplete.

looking for sht in other places when i know i dont need to but when it comes down to it nothing can replace the real thing. nothing !

miss him !

If it really exists

So I was thinking I was close to discovering love again for the second time... (nope!)
The first time I believed that I found it was because I was forcing it. No real connection there... just great sex cool chemistry, great laughs and a whole bunch of bad memories, emotions and time that i cant get back :(
but now there is someone new. something that seems unreal. too good to be true. yeah that kind of person. i don't know where he came from or why. interested to see if he has the answer to my question.
if at the end of this i will be happy. smiling.
not running down memory lane with the girls laughing at how stupid and how dumb he was..
idk maybe he'll be the one
and
he can answer if LOVE really exists?

i think its following me...

couldnt find a working pen...

but i just needed to write .... DEATH i s following me :?